Let us start with some real life examples from various people testimonies below:
1. Irrelevant in my opinion!
I have dated men ranging from 10 years younger
than me to 19 years older than me in my lifetime. I married a man who is 2
years younger than me, and we get along beautifully, but I don't think it has
anything to do with age.
Relationships are truly two people coming together
who have common interests, common goals, common family values, etc. with
enough differences to keep it interesting! Relationships are what you make
them, and it doesn't matter how old either party is, in my own opinion.
Looking at Anna Nicole and the oil millionaire,
well, I often wondered what they had in common, but who am I to judge them?
We all have soul-mates, and I truly believe the man upstairs is the one who
knows what and/or who is best suited for us...as long as two people enjoy one
another, who are we to judge? Age is just a number...
|
The two couples I know that have been together
longest have age differences that you would think would cause problems. The
first has the wife being five years older than her husband and the second the
husband is 15 years older than his wife.
I got married late and am 15 years older than my wife and we will be celebrating our ten next year. I believe that is longer than most marriages last these days. Age is only one factor in the success of a marriage. Communication and humour help a lot. |
3. It depends on the psychological makeup of the
individual.
I've heard that marriages of great age difference
tend to run in families, but I can't find anything to back that up, and it
certainly wasn't true in my own family. My father was 21 years older than my
mother (and still lived long enough to have a golden anniversary), yet my
sisters and I married men much closer to our own ages.
It was interesting to watch my daughter, the
quintessential alpha female. All of her boyfriends, and eventually the one
she married, were somewhat younger than she, because she has a psychological
need to be the dominant person and to call the shots.
In a sense, I think it is irrelevant, because we
are all unique individuals with our own distinct notions of what we want from
a relationship. That allows for a wide range of couplings, and who's to say
what is right or wrong in affairs of the heart?
|
4. You may be
familiar with the old folk-wisdom formula
A woman should be one-half the man's age plus seven years. I think perhaps this was calculated by a man, because by seventy you're dating someone who is 42, which is pretty much reaching down into the previous generation.
In actuality, I don't think age difference
matters much as long as the two people are truly compatible. I actually knew
someone once who had married his daughter's best friend from high school.
This was after she had graduated. But she was the same age as his daughter.
The daughter seemed fine with the arrangement, as did the wife. The husband
was a retired Marine. Most of the guys I knew felt he must be the luckiest
man in the world. He was much older than us at the time, but most of us would
have felt the woman was too young for US!
The most important consideration I think is that if the age difference is great, and usually in these cases it is the man who is older, that if you plan to have children you must consider the probability that you will die or become incapacitated before the children reach maturity. I believe this is something that a couple in this situation should talk over carefully and thoroughly. 
HAVING SEEN REAL LIFE EXAMPLES ABOVE, HERE ARE SOME FACTS ABOUT AGE DIFFERENCE?
As defined by
society, the practice of men preferring to marry younger women and women preferring
older men has been in existence since the concept of matrimonial alliance
itself came into existence. What has changed over the years though, is the age
difference between husband and wife. More recently, women seem to prefer
marrying highly successful men, who are considerably older than these women.
Average Age Difference in Marriage over the Years A look at the statistical data compiled over the last century suggests that the age difference in a matrimonial alliance has been constantly changing owing to several underlying factors. This reversal in the average age difference for marriage was attributed to factors such as education, women becoming more and more independent, better contraception, etc. Today, things have changed considerably as both men and women are giving their career first priority, thus, making matrimonial alliance take a back seat. Does it affect the Marriage? New trends also suggest a drastic age difference in married couples, which can be as much as 15 years, today. The best example of this is the rising number of celebrity couples who are getting into matrimonial alliances despite the significant difference in their age. The bad part, though, is that the age difference in relationships can result in a wide range of marital problems. Some of the most common problems which can be attributed to extreme difference in age include lack of understanding, infidelity, sex drive disparity, financial problems, etc. A closer look and one would realize that all these problems are related to each other, either directly or indirectly.
For instance, generation gap can result in
lack of understanding between the two partners and this may result in either of
the partners finding solace with a third person, thus, leading to infidelity.
So what should be the Ideal Difference? Ideally, the age difference between two people getting into a matrimonial alliance should be somewhere between 5 - 10 years. Basically, one has to take into consideration the fact that men attain maturity late as compared to women, which implies that men need more time to get accustomed to the responsibilities associated with a family.
Marrying late
also gives men enough time to get set with their career. Even though women seem
to prefer getting married late so that they get enough time to fulfil their
ambitions on the career front, they need to be careful as opting for marriage
too late can affect the biological cycle and result in medical complications
when having children in the future.
Even though there are examples of happily married couples with a significant age difference, the number of such examples is considerably low. Interestingly, the same rule of the thumb applies in case of a situation, wherein a woman marries a man younger to her.
However, in the end, these are merely numbers and to make any marriage work, one
needs to put in a genuine
amount of effort so as to ensure that the marriage is a long and happy one.
|
